"Wuv, Twu wuv!"

It's what everyone wants. It's what all the stories and fairy tales tell about. It's a small word, so often used, yet so often misunderstood.

Love.

What is love?

To some, love is "want" and "need." It's someone who gives me what I want and what I need at that time. To them, love is a pleasure of the moment, or a security blanket. It's something that only supports them with little regards to others.

To others, love is "lust." Do I need to explain further? Just in case: to them, love is all physical. It's a good figure, muscles, soft skin. It's kissing and so on. It's a Samson view of love - beauty matters most.

But then to some, love is emotion. It's all a feeling and has little or nothing to do with commitment. It comes and goes with each person that they find interesting. It lasts a while - maybe even a few years - until the person makes them mad or does something they don't like. Emotions come and go.

Then there's another viewpoint. Love is a choice. You choose to love someone - that's all it takes. You just have to tell yourself "I am going to love this person, no matter what," and you will love them. Compatibility doesn't matter, likes and dislikes don't matter, and personalities don't have to match. It's just the choice that counts.

So what is love? In my experience (yes, limited perhaps, but still there nonetheless), I'd have to say I disagree with all of the above.

Shocked?

You see, to me, love is definitely not "want" or "need," though when you love someone, you do try to give them what they need, and it's fun to give them what they want when you can. Love is not "lust." However, in a marriage relationship, sex (not a cuss word, people!) is very important to the relationship. It's a fact of life, kids - get over it. Love is not "emotion." But where would the butterflies come from if it had nothing to do with emotion at all? Where would the blushing happen? Where would the shaking on the first date happen? When would you cry over a loss? When would you blubber like a baby while proposing? And where would the joys of a wedding be without the emotion behind love? Last but not least, love is not just choice. This is where this gets sticky, so let me explain further.

The phrase "love is a choice" is so common that it's often taken as solid fact and nothing else. However, love must be more than a choice. If love were only a choice, then it would be easy to find a guy that is a total slob, doesn't know his left from his right, and thinks that a woman is only for cooking his meals, and fall madly in love with him. Get real! I'm sorry, but there are some guys out there that it would take an act of God to make me love him. Love is so much more than a choice.

BUT, let's not forget the importance of the choice. Answer this: what makes love last? One word sums it up: commitment. Choice is that commitment. Choice is what says that no matter what happens, I am going to continue loving this person that I love now. If times get tough, I'm still going to love him. If she becomes paralyzed, I'm still going to love and care for her. If he is unfaithful, I'm going to forgive him and try to love him. Regardless of what happens, when you make a commitment, it is the choice that makes love survive throughout time.

So what is love? In summary, I say love starts as an emotion that blossoms into a commitment. That sums it up pretty well, I'd say. Love will last with the commitment, and love lives with passion.